Facebook Yeti

LaZorra: I tried. I'm probably going to use G+ more once I FINALLY DELETE FACEBOOK GEEZ.

LaZorra: I tried to delete it this weekend, and people were texting me going, "AHHHH DON'T DELETE IT UNTIL I SAVE ALL THE PICTURESSSS" and I still don't know if they're finished.

ThePhan: Heh, yeah, I noticed you hadn't deleted your Facebook yetr.

ThePhan: *yet

LaZorra: I have not deleted my Facebook yeti, no.

wintermute: Facebook yeti?

LaZorra: BEAT

LaZorra: The Facebook yeti is only sighted once in a while in Farmville. He comes to make off with a few of your cows and then leaves.

ThePhan: If Facebook promised you a yeti if you didn't delete your page, what would you do?

LaZorra: TP: Oh man, I've always wanted a yeti!

LaZorra: I'd love him and pet him and call him George.

Going to Realize Fish

LaZorra: So I agreed to write a blog post for a journalism think-tank type of deal.

LaZorra: It's due tonight, shouldbe about a thousand words, and I have half a phrase written.

LaZorra: This is feeling an awful lot like school.

wintermute: Have you tried writing "I am a fish" 250 times?

Sentynel: Yes, but it isn't school. You can Douglas Adams it up and enjoy the whooshing sound of a deadline flying by without failing your degree.

LaZorra: wm: I think perhaps people clicking through to school is goign to realize fish.

LaZorra: ...um

Randy: 'what??

wintermute: ?

* LaZorra falls over.

Maryam: LOL?

LaZorra: SEVENTEEN WHOOSH RABBITS

LaZorra: And a glass of milk turned ravenous ravens.

[RinkChat] User LaZorra has been kicked from the room by LaZorra.

LaZorra has left.

LaZorra has entered.

LaZorra: *wm: I think perhaps people clicking through on a JavaScript tutorial might realize that it was about fish instead.

Lou Ferrigno Visits RinkChat

LouFerrigno has entered.

LouFerrigno: What?

Goosey: LOU

ThePhan: LOL LOL LOL

Goosey: LAZORRA HAS SOMETHING FOR YOU

LaZorra: LOU LOU LOU

LaZorra: I LOVE YOU

LaZorra: *throws Phan's panties*

Goosey: LOL!!

ThePhan: LaZorra is writing a love poem.

LouFerrigno: Hi there LaZorra, thanks for the panties.

ThePhan: HEY WAIT

Goosey: hahahaha

ThePhan: I was wearing those!

LouFerrigno: I made them into a ladder to climb out of the hole I feel in.

LaZorra: 8-.

LouFerrigno: Or fell.

LaZorra: LOL LOL

LaZorra: PANTYLADDER

* Goosey does NOT want to know what holes Lou was feeling in.

ThePhan: The hole is only in your mind!

* LaZorra snorts repeadtedly

LouFerrigno: ThePhan: How right you are!

LaZorra: Lou: You should have used TOAST!

Randy: Lou: Would we like you when you're angry?

LouFerrigno: mmm toast

Goosey: Hey, Lou! Got a sword on you?

* LaZorra is absolutely dying at the mental image of Lou Ferrigno going, "mmm, toast."

LouFerrigno: Randy: No, cause then I get sad and sometimes cry a little. Then you would feel bad about making me, the world's strongest men, cry.

Goosey: Lou: How many men are you?

LouFerrigno: Goosey: Sure, right here!

* LouFerrigno throws it away

LaZorra: Aww, it's okay, Lou. Just remember how shiny your muscles are when they're covered in baby oil.

* Goosey retrieves sword.

ThePhan: LOL

Goosey: Hey, thanks!

LaZorra: Goosey: IT HAS HIS SWAT ON IT *swoon*

LaZorra: Sweat, even.

Goosey: LOL!!!

LouFerrigno: :-.

* Goosey keeps the sword, but collects the sweat in a little vial and presents it to LaZorra.

LouFerrigno: Yeah...this place is too weird for me.

Goosey: And that's saying something.

LouFerrigno: And I did a movie with Jafar and Poochie.

ThePhan: We look like a... a bunch of weirdos.

* Goosey beats Lou Ferrigno the only way she can -- by WITS.

LaZorra: Poochie is downright normal, what do you mean?

LaZorra: Why else would he keep showing up on my ink blots?

Goosey: LOL

ThePhan: LOL

LouFerrigno: I came in to give something special to one special lady

Goosey: aww, how nice.

* LouFerrigno throws his speedo at LaZorra

LouFerrigno has left.

Goosey: O__O

* LaZorra faints.

* Goosey runs away from LaZorra

* LaZorra crashes to the floor where Goosey was.

* Goosey was actually running away from the speedo, but unfortunately it was on LaZorra.

LaZorra: HEY I LOOK DAMNED GOOD IN A SPEEDO okay not really BUT HEY

Goosey: LOL LOL

* LaZorra bronzes the speedo and hangs it on her wall next to the Indiana Jones whip.

Goosey: hehehehe nice

* ThePhan will watch the movie for real now. She thinks.

ThePhan: I was about to, and then Lou showed up.

Goosey: hehehe

LaZorra: See? Lou's incapable of not ruining a movie.

Goosey: LOL!

Randy: LOL

ThePhan: LOL

Randy: Lessons learned: Don't tell your girlfriend you were pretending to have panties thrown at you.

LaZorra: LOL LOL LOL

Randy: TOPICBOT?

LaZorra: YES

LaZorra: I would just like to TOPICBOT this whole convo.

Visit LaZorra Plans

ThePhan: Also, I AM MAKING VISIT LAZORRA PLANS EVERYONE BE JEALOUS :-P

* Goosey IS JEALOUS

Randy: TP: SO JEALOUS

LaZorra: :D

Goosey: Send me some Visit LaZorra Plans! WANT

LaZorra: LOL

ThePhan: LOL

LaZorra: She's creating a kit.

ThePhan: Yup!

LaZorra: It will contain a large piece of green posterboard with "I EET YOR HED" stencilled on it.

ThePhan: It includes carrots for her nose, study guys, and panties to throw at Lou Ferrigno.

Goosey: LOL

ThePhan: Also that.

LaZorra: LOL LOL LOL

* Goosey tries to laugh and cough at the same time and nearly chockes

Goosey: *chokse

Goosey: *CHOKES

LaZorra: hahah

ThePhan: I feel like this should be a BlitzBot question: "Things That Go In a Visit LaZorra Plan Kit."

Get Out of the Butter

Goosey: Phan: I was in a one-act when I was still VL, and we had to change the business so he kissed me on the forehead instead of on the lips 'cause I was too chicken.

Ticia: "change the business?"

Goosey: TP: heheh

Goosey: "dialogue" is what you say, "business" is what you do

Ticia: Oh, okay then.

Goosey: Get your mind out of the gutter, Ticia

Randy: I had to do a scene where I made out with a girl and touch parts of her I wasn't sure she really wanted me to.

Goosey: Get out of the butter, randy

Goosey: *gutter

ThePhan: LOL LOL

ThePhan: GET OUT OF THE BUTTER

Goosey: LOL

Randy: I WAS MAKING TOAST

Goosey: LOL LOIL LOL

* Goosey dies

Mia: haha

Kysle: lol

* LaZorra comes back and reads teh buffer and cracks up.

* Goosey is still laughing

LaZorra: Mostly because now I have a mental image of Randy's face smeared with butter while Goosey yells at him.

LaZorra: "What butter? I don't know what you're talking about."

* Goosey wipes away tears and gasps for breath

ThePhan: LOL

ThePhan: Now all I can picture is him cheerfully sitting face down in a giant butter tub.

LaZorra: LOL LOL

Goosey: sitting face down??

Goosey: Where does Randy keep his face?

LaZorra: TOPICBOT

Randy: =-O

ThePhan: Well, he's sitting down in FRONT of the butter, but then he's leaned over and shoved his face into it.

Goosey: LOL LOL

ThePhan: Like a pie eating contest or something.

Goosey: OHhhhh "sitting, face down in . . ."

LaZorra: TP: Oh, LOL, I was picturing him sitting on the boottre, with his face between his knees.

Goosey: BOOTTRE

ThePhan: ...Boottre?

LaZorra: er

ThePhan: Was that once "butter"?

Goosey: LOL LOL LOL

LaZorra: CLEARLY that is pronounced, "boo-TRAY"

* Goosey dies AGAIN

LaZorra: It is fancy butter.

ThePhan: LaZorra only eats the best French butter.

Randy: LOL LOL

ThePhan: Ahem, excuse me, I mean, boottre.

* TalkingDog wanders back. He says "Uh."

Randy: LOL LOL

Goosey: LOL LOL LOL

Randy: So is this going to the quotes page?

ThePhan: Uh, yes.

Goosey: THE WHOLE THING

ThePhan: Not right now.

ThePhan: But it will be there.

LaZorra: Monsieur A-TalkinkDok, would zyo like zome toast wiz boottre?

LaZorra: ..."toast wiz" totally makes me think of Cheez Wiz, except...toast flavor.

Goosey: LOL!

TalkingDog: ...Oui?

* LaZorra snaps her fingers and a proper french butler twirls out of the kitchen in a frilly pink tutu and offers TalkingDog some toast.

* Goosey finally breathes.

Goosey: Do proper French butlers wear frilly pink tutus??

* Goosey learns something new everyday.

ThePhan: Um. "A-TalkinkDok" just keeps sounding like "badonkadonk" in my head.

Goosey: LOL!

LaZorra: It iz zee way in zee Olt Countree.

LaZorra: TPL LOL LOL

Randy: A TalkingDog Badaonkadong.

Randy: gah

Randy: you know what I meant

LaZorra: A TALKINGDOG BADONKEYKONG

Goosey: LOL

* TalkingDog just puts out more Doritos and hides in the empty bag.

LaZorra: That must have been a LOT of Doritos.

[RinkChat] User TalkingDog has been shrunken by Goosey.

Goosey: There, that should be easier for him.

ThePhan: Now he can fit!

Randy: LOL

LaZorra: The Dorito Adventures of TalkingDog!

Randy: Poor TD:

LaZorra: Randy: You've turned the last letter of his initials into a frowny face!

Randy: At least he doesn

Goosey: Yeah, at least he doesn

Randy: 't eat butter sitting face down

Randy: HUSH YOU

Goosey: O:-)

LaZorra: RANDY GET OUT OF THE BUTTER

* LaZorra totally wants toast now.

ThePhan: If there is a little man sitting in the butter, tell him to get out of it.

Martin Kuter Was a Bi Fab of Doritos

ThePhan: So a large part of my dinnertime with Jacob consisted of him drawing bizarre little cartoon characters on a napkin, and we made up stories about them.

ThePhan: The cast included a dinosaur, and a creepy mad scientist holding a loaf of French bread, and a tentacled girl, and a guy with only one arm, one eye, and one leg, and then, er, Martin Luther.

Goosey: LOL

Randy: LOL

ThePhan: It was a silly evening. But a fun one.

Randy: Was...was Martin Luther the hero or villian?

ThePhan: The hero. He had a magic shield.

Randy: Of course!

* TalkingDog doesn't know what's going on, but he puts out Doritos.

Goosey: Ooh, doritos. *crunch*

LaZorra: TD: Martin Kuter was a bi fab of doritos.

Goosey: Martin who?

TalkingDog: Was a what?

* LaZorra istyping with one hand.

Randy: LOL

Goosey: Aston's religious brother!

Strophes and Antistrophes

ThePhan: When we had to read Medea for theater history, a group of us got together and read it out loud.
ThePhan: There were all these little notes next to the chorus' lines: "Strophe" and "antistrophe."
ThePhan: We looked them up and discovered that the strophe means that the Greek chorus chants as it moves from right to left across the stage, while in the antistrophe, they move left to right.
ThePhan: From then on, every time we read those lines, we'd all pretend we were dancing whichever direction we were supposed to.
ThePhan: It made the long chorus monologues so much more entertaining.
ThePhan: We could have tap dancing strophes and antistrophes.
LaZorra: That would be amazing.
Sentynel: Is a catastrophe what happens when half the chorus is doing a strophe and the other half is doing an antistrophe?
ThePhan: LOL LOL LOL
ThePhan: YES
LaZorra: *snerk*

Hungarian Folk Dance Algorithms

Sentynel: And now for something completely different:
Sentynel: Here is the quicksort algorithm in the form of a folk dance.
Sentynel: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ywWBy6J5gz8
LaZorra: Sentynel; THAT IS THE GREATEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN
Sentynel: LaZ: Their channel has videos for quicksort, merge sort, shell sort, select sort, bubble sort and insert sort. Mostly with different types of folk dance.
LaZorra: That is...I can't even...
Sentynel: You're welcome.
LaZorra: "Hungarian folk dance is such a slow programming language." LOL
Sentynel: You could probably craft a Turing-complete Hungarian folk dance.
LaZorra: O.o
Sentynel: If xkcd can simulate a universe with an infinite plain of rocks in the sand, I'm simulating a universe with an infinite Hungarian folk dance.
ThePhan: That's a lot of dancing Hungarian folk.
Sentynel: Yep.
Maryam: Can an infinite number of Hungarian folk dancers eventually stamp out the entire works of Shakespeare in the dirt with their feet?
Sentynel: Yes. Yes they can.
* ThePhan will now incorporate Hungarian folk dancers into every high school production she ever directs.

Cleaning Surprise

(About my suitemate.)

ThePhan: This girl DID go on a "BUY ALL THE CLEANING SURPRISE EVER" spree when she moved in.
Sentynel: HAHAHAHA
Sentynel: CLEANING SURPRISE
ThePhan: Er.
ThePhan: Surprise?
ThePhan: LOL LOL SUPPLIES
Sentynel: You're challenging Heather's crown there!
ThePhan: WHAT WAS THAT

Oregon Trail Trading

Goosey: My cousin came over.
Goosey: So I missed most of the UBT :(
Goosey: But that's okay. I traded her my treadmill and the loan of a mattress for an ace bandage and three strings of christmas lights
TalkingDog: That sounds like an odd variation of Oregon Trail.

Too Many Bots

QuoteBot: Question: Who said this? _______: I have a... er... dad dad. (1) Leen, (2) Homestarmy, (3) Darien, (4) Maryam, (5) pffft, (6) Lifeforce.
Sam: vote 6
Sam: Um.
Sentynel: LOL
Ticia: lol
Randy: I don't know
* Sentynel tries to work out if that was a bluff.
Sam: Too many bots tonight.

CrackBot Wins!

(This is what happens when you play ALL THE BOTS AT ONCE.)

LineBot: CrackBot wins 2 points for Vote 6 for I left Facebook after Goosey's numerous statuses about entertaining swordsmen with her castanets. The only guy I ever had over was the plumber.
LineBot: LaZorra wins 2 points for I left Facebook after Goosey's numerous statuses about entertaining swordsmen with her castanets. The only guy I ever had over was the plumber.
LineBot: ThePhan wins 1 point for Goosey wanted to be a plumber and write statuses about swordsmen playing castanets.
LineBot: LaZorra loses a point for submitting and not voting.
LineBot: CrackBot wins!
Sentynel: Did CrackBot just win LineBot with LaZ's LineBot submission?
Sentynel: mind=blown
Sam: Sent: Yes.

WordZap: Moist Touching

MatchBot: Vote 2 for touching [-2] 10Kan.
MatchBot: Vote 6 for moist [-2] towelettes.
ThePhan: moist [+1] touching [+1]
Sam: touching
Sam: moist
ThePhan: ...uh.
Sentynel: touchign
Sentynel: moist
ThePhan: Creepy combo of words there.
LaZorra: MOIST TOWLETTES ARE A MUST HAVE
Sam: Suddenly all of us are shouting MOIST! TOUCHING!

Hearing Issues and the Pope

CrackBot: CrackBot asks: What issue [-2] are you tired of hearing [-2] about? (1/* accepted)
Kysle: issue [+1]
ThePhan: issue hearing [+1] apt
Sam: hearing issue
Sentynel: jhearing
Ticia: issue
Ticia: Do we /b this?
Sam: Yes.
ThePhan: If not, a lot of people are tired of hearing about hearing issues [+3].
LaZorra: I WISH THE DEAF PEOPE WOULD SHUT UP ALREADY
ThePhan: LZ: That that said "Pope [+3]" instead of "Peope."
ThePhan: *Thought
Sentynel: That that!
ThePhan: *Thought thought

Phan Doesn't Know How to Play ANY Bots

LetterBot: Make up a sentence using only the letters A, M, N, O, T, U. (2/18 accepted)
.
.
.
ThePhan: LOL I FORGOT IT WAS A WHOLE SENTENCE
ThePhan: I was like, "This is silly."

(My submissions were "mount" and "amount.")
Shortly after that...

LineBot: Make up a sentence using the words fiesta, thill, sludge [+3], skives, four. (1/* accepted)
Sam: ...THERE IS NO SUCH SENTENCE.
ThePhan: ...Using the words?
ThePhan: What?
ThePhan: I do not remember this game at ALL.
.
.
.
LineBot: Time's up! There were no valid submissions.
ThePhan: OH RIGHT
ThePhan: LOL LOL I DON'T REMEMBER HOW TO PLAY ANY OF THESE
ThePhan: I thought we could ONLY use those words.
ThePhan: And I was like "WHAT THE HECK?"
LaZorra: Phan: LOL LOL
ThePhan: I am crying right now because I'm laughing so hard.
LaZorra: I AM VERY CLOSE
* LaZorra presses herself up against Phan's window.
LaZorra: SEE HOW CLOSE I AM
LaZorra: ?????
ThePhan: Trying to figure out how in the world to organize "fiesta, thill, sludge, skives, four" all into a sentence without any other words.
ThePhan: (Incidentally, Sam's cry of "THERE IS NO SUCH SENTENCE" made so much sense in my warped understanding of the game.)
LaZorra: TP: AHAHHAHA

Sinman

SinbadCaptionBot: LaZorra wins 0 points for Sinman wasn't too crazy about the new workout his pysihcal trainer had devised.
Ticia: LaZorra: Sinman?
ThePhan: SINMAN
Sentynel: LOL, I didn't see that one.
ThePhan: LOL LOL
Sam: SIN MAN!
Sentynel: Batman's nautical cousin.
ThePhan: I am seriously laughing uncontrollably right now.
LaZorra: augh
LaZorra: BAD
LaZorra: BAD
LaZorra: LEROY BROWN
iwpg: Yes, BAD!
Sam: That's the strangest superhero ever. His superpower? TO DISHONOR HIS FATHER AND MOTHER!
10Kan: Sam: LOL
LaZorra: LOL LOL
Sam: With superhuman ability, Sin Man COVETS HIS NEIGHBOR'S WIFE!

The Naked Vikings

(The picture was one of the Viking Warrior, shirtless as always.)

SinbadCaptionBot: Sam wins 5 points for The Viking Warrior didn't have even clothes to wear.
* Sam waits for everyone to thank him for putting the image of a NAKED VIKING WARRIOR in everyone's minds.
ThePhan: LOL
Kysle: It didn't, until you just said it again.
Ticia: hahaha
Ticia: THANK YOU SAM
Sam: YOU'RE WELCOME
LaZorra: hehe
Ticia: No, seriously. Thank you.
LaZorra: SAM I ALREADY HAD THAT MENTAL IMAGE SO HA
Sam: LOL
ThePhan: LAZORRA THINKS ABOUT NAKED VIKINGS ALL DAY LONG
LaZorra: :-.
LaZorra: I AM BUILDING THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE'S NAKED VIKING WEBSITE OKAY
Randy: TOPICBOT
ThePhan: LOL LOL LOL
Ticia: lol
Randy: And again.
ThePhan: I love you people.

Mad Phan

(During a SinbadCaptionBot game.)

lelo14: do we only vote once?
Sentynel: Yes, unless you're voting for Vlad Putin.
ThePhan: Sent: Somehow I thought that said "Unless you're voting for Mad Phan."
Sentynel: Phan: ...You're definitely mad.
* ThePhan IS MAD! VOTE FOR ME!
Randy: vote Phan
ThePhan: A VOTE FOR ME IS A VOTE FOR MADNESS!
* Sentynel is all in favour of madness.

Boyfriend Test

(Formatting is weird in Blogger this week and I really don't feel like doing it all manually, so no bolding of names and such. That's all.)

* ThePhan is going to make Jacob watch Sinbad over Christmas break.
Randy: Nice!
Goosey: Phan: YESSSS
LaZorra: Phan: YES
Ticia: TP: Woo!
Sam: TP: Yay! It's a good boyfriend test. If he doesn't like it, you know to break up with him.
Ticia: haha
ThePhan: Sam: Yeah, that's pretty much what I'm thinking.
LaZorra: "I am sorry, you do not like Lou Ferrigno. GOOBYE!"
Sentynel: "I'm sorry. I just can't be with a man who doesn't appreciate Sinbad's massive pecs!"
* ThePhan may have to live-blog his reactions here in chat.
LaZorra: Phan: PLEASE
Sam: TP: YES DO THAT! I'll archive it.
ThePhan: Besides, if he doesn't watch Sinbad, how will he know to say, "Gosh, you're beautiful" to me?
Randy: LOL LOL
Ticia: lol lol LOL
LaZorra: LOL LOL
Goosey: LOL LOL
Ticia: lol lOL LOL
Randy: I showed Sarah some of the clips on youtube. She thinks we're all crazy.
Sentynel: Make sure you schedule it in advance so we can come and watch.
ThePhan: Sent: LOL, I totally will.
Randy: YES
Sentynel: We have the oddest spectator sports.

GPS Bacon Wristwatch

ThePhan: There was a conversation Jacob and I had about him randomly giving people his number. Like he thought I said one of his friends had texted me, and so we decided that he was so excited to have a girlfriend that everywhere he went, he'd been handing out my number to people. "Hi! I have a girlfriend! Here's her number!"
ThePhan: Er.
ThePhan: That first sentence should be "randomly giving people *my* number."
Sam: LOL
Randy: LOL LOL
10Kan: "No, seriously! Call her and ask!"
ThePhan: LOL
ThePhan: RIGHT as I typed that, he texts me, "Sup girlfriend?!"
ThePhan: It's like he knew I was talking about him.
Randy: awwww
ThePhan: CREEPY.
10Kan: 8-o
* Sentynel emails "SHE KNOWS" to Jacob.
* ThePhan checks outside her window to make sure he's not being a stalker and somehow reading my RinkChat conversations.
ThePhan: He *claims* he's at Wal-Mart.
10Kan: Give him a GPS beacon wristwatch.
ThePhan: I thought that said "a GPS bacon wristwatch."
ThePhan: Which sounded bizarre but AWESOME.
Randy: ME TOO
Sentynel: Mmm, globally positioned bacon.
ThePhan: Google informs me: No results found for "gps bacon wristwatch".
ThePhan: Sad.
Maryam: What about just a normal bacon wristwatch?
ThePhan: http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001R...ive=390957&creativeASIN=B001R1R400
Maryam: LOL! I KNEW it must exist.

Accidental RinkChat

LaZorra has entered.

LaZorra: ...er, wow, I did not mean to come in here.

LaZorra: I meant to go take a shower.

* TalkingDog HUGS teh laz!

TalkingDog: Here is better than showers.

* LaZorra actually does go take a whoer now.

TalkingDog: ...a what now?

Randy: A whoer?

Randy: A Whoer is someone that dresses up like Dr. Who characters at conventions.

Parenting Through Regexes

(In one corner, Goosey's complaining about someone's parenting style. In another, TalkingDog and Sentynel are talking coding.)

Goosey: It's mostly that she's inconsistent.

Goosey: Illustration:

Sentynel: It should still be possible to regex for "*[allowed username chars]+* | *[allowed username chars]+\-\>" though.

Maryam: For a second I thought Sentynel's line was Goosey's illustration and I was all @.@

Sentynel: I fully support parenting through regexes.

Accidental Puns

LaZorra: The high next week is going to be 31. THIRTY-ONE.

* ThePhan is not cool with winter.

Randy: TP:I've been warming up to it.

LaZorra: It's definitely not giving me the cold shoulder.

ThePhan: LOL MY PUN WAS AN ACCIDENT

* ThePhan can't believe she did that.

Mushy Couples

Randy: I want to do a podcast sometime

ThePhan: Randy: You need to do the whatever the heck podcast we're doing with you and me and Smith and Lisa and Sarah!

Randy: YES

Randy: TP: Get Jacob in there and we can all be mushy couples.

ThePhan: Ha, YES!

ThePhan: We can even title the podcast Mushy Couples.

ThePhan: (Except Jacob and I are not very mushy to each other. So we're a li'l bit behind you guys.)

Randy: LOL

Randy: Thats ok

Randy: Sarah said "hahahaha!" and "ewwwww"

ThePhan: LOL

ThePhan: That is probably the correct response.

Sentynel: Fun fact: it appears I associate the word "mushy" very strongly with mushy peas.

Sentynel: This rendered this discussion somewhat surreal to say the least.

Randy: LOL

ThePhan: Sent: LOL!

The Queen's Copy

Sentynel: LOL LOL

Sentynel: Facebook post:

Sentynel: "Whoever has the Queen's copy of 'The Princeton Companion to Classical Japanese literature', do you still need it? Can I borrow it please??"

Sentynel: Comment:

Sentynel: "For a moment I thought you were just casually borrowing books from Her Majesty."

Maryam: So what are they referring to by 'the Queen'?

Sentynel: The Queen's College, Oxford.

Maryam: Aha.

Sentynel: Correct positioning of the apostrophe there is VERY IMPORTANT, mostly because a) there's a Queens' College in Cambridge, and b) it often got missed off completely.

Sentynel: There were a couple of people with a profitable side-business in sewing the apostrophe onto university hoodies and stuff that missed it out.

Sentynel: But then "The Queen's College" gets shortened to just "Queen's", and tada, grammatical ambiguity.

Freeting Separtment

ThePhan: Ooh, I forgot! I have a LaZorra typo story.

ThePhan: Yesterday, as I was leaving chat, she told me twice to tell Jacob she said hi. So I told him she said hi twice, and he responded, "Well, tell her that *I* say hi THREE times."

ThePhan: So I texted her and told her this. A few hours later, I get this text:

ThePhan: "Ha! I have been one-upped in the freeting separtment! Challenge accepted! Also, you have a food trip home too. :)"

Sam: hahaha

ThePhan: This was followed almost immediately by another text: "Er. Wow. So many typos. #earlymorning #fatfingers #blurrycontacts"

[RinkChat] The chat room's topic has been changed to 'Welcome to the freeting separtment.' by Sam.

Evangelia and Leora

Sam: Weird spam: "I was at a party, got drunk, couldn't drive the car, somebody gave me a lift on my car, and crossed on the red light many times, I've just got the pictures, maybe you know him? Here is the photo. I need to find him urgently! Thank you, Evangelia."

Sam: No photos were attached.

Sam: I'm not sure what the goal of that spam is.

Sentynel: Maybe it's targeting clairvoyants.

Sentynel: Alternatively, maybe there were images and a virus scanner somewhere removed them.

Sentynel: Or, maybe it's fishing for live email addresses by trying to induce responses from misguidedly helpful people.

Sam: Here's another identical spam, except that this one is from "Leora."

Sam: Maybe.

Sam: Except that the return email addresses are evangelia@rinkworks.com and leora@rinkworks.com.

Sam: So those aren't going to get back to anybody.

ThePhan: Evangelia and Leora have been secretly working on RinkWorks for years.

Sam: If so, I need to crack the whip. There has not been nearly enough new content lately.

Talk Quick

* ThePhan realizes Sam and LaZorra are both here and so she says HI GUYS!

* LaZorra HUGS Phan!

* ThePhan HUGS LaZorra!

ThePhan: I am only here for another 15 minutes or so, though, before I go have dinner with Jacob, then rehearsal, then start the 5 1/2 drive home.

ThePhan: SO TALK QUICK EVERYONE

LaZorra: OKAYTODAYWASGREATANDOHEMGEEITISCOLDHEREANDITISRAININGBUTIGOHOMETOMORROWMORNINGATLIKETHREEINTHEMORNINGSOITISASUCKYDAYBUTIGETTOBEHOMEUNTILSATURDAYANDHOWAREYOUWILLYOUBEINMYNECKOFTHEWOODSANDSAYHITOJACOBFORME

Sentynel: Ifyoudrovequickly,youcouldhavemoretimehereandwewouldn'tneedtotalksofast.

Sentynel: HEY

ThePhan: LOL LOL

ThePhan: I love you all.

LaZorra: SENTYNELSTOPPEDFORPUNCTUATIONANDSOIBEATHIM

Ticia: Well,let'ssee,idon'treallyhavemuchtosaybutnowifeelallpressuredtosaysomethingprofoundandreallyreallyfastandit'sreallyhardtotypewithoutusingthespacebarbuglandsgettingeasier.

* goldfishy just has nothing to say

ThePhan: BUGLANDS

LaZorra: BIGLANDS

Ticia: lol

Ticia: Idon'tknowwherethatcamefrom

Ticia: it was supposed to be "but it's getting easier"

LaZorra: Ticia: Plural of a small, unforutantely named bird.

Ticia: unforutantely?

LaZorra: ummm

LaZorra: yes

LaZorra: Ticia: (.)(.)

Ticia: !!

LaZorra: LOL

Ticia: Why are you making boobs at me?

ThePhan: LOL LOL

LaZorra: IT IS THE NAME OF THE BIRD

Sentynel: Just don't say THAT SEABIRD THAT IS LIKE BOOBIES.

wintermute: bu[t it's]

Ticia: Remember my rules!

wintermute: becomes bu[glands].

Ticia: I'm going to have to ground myself if you guys don't stop.

LaZorra: LOL LOL

ThePhan: LOL LOL

ThePhan: Once again:

ThePhan: I love you all.

Lack of Trust

(Sam and I had been /msging about someone who wouldn't answer personal questions but instead accused the asker of having a lack of trust. So then this happened.)

Sam: So what's everyone up to?

Sam: ANSWER ME.

Sam: WHY ARE YOU IGNORING MY QUESTION.

Sam: YOU MUST SUFFER FROM A LACK OF TRUST.

* Sentynel is on a moon landing mission, and thus communications are delayed by a few seconds.

ThePhan: LOL

Sam: Neat.

ThePhan: I am catching up on some blog reading.

* TalkingDog is helping his brother install a new cooling unit, in exchange for 4 GB of memory. That's currency now.

Sam: YOU ALL SUFFER FROM TOO MUCH TRUST

Sam: YOU'RE ALL TELLING ME THE INTIMATE DETAILS OF WHAT YOU'RE DOING, or at least the broad strokes of it, AND I COULD BE ANYBODY.

TalkingDog: How do you know I was telling the truth?

TalkingDog: I might actually be getting 4 GiB.

TalkingDog: That's giga-imaginary-bytes. Totally different.

Sam: You won't tell me if you were truthful or not? YOU SUFFER FROM A LACK OF TRUST.

Crap Apple

Sentynel: I guess I'm a bit spoilt 'cos Dad makes his own jam.

Sam: Niiice.

Sam: We've made our own on occasion.

Sentynel: Mostly blackberry, because there's SO MANY blackberries growing wild in the fields around us.

Sentynel: But we also grow some fruit, and he's made jam from that sometimes. Blackcurrants work well.

Sentynel: Oh, and he's made crap apple jelly once or twice.

Sentynel: Again, loads of it grows wild.

Sam: I don't think I would like that one.

10Kan: Is that a typo, or is it really that bad?

[RinkChat] The chat room's topic has been changed to 'How about a nice spoonful of crap apple jelly!' by Sam.

Sentynel: Err.

Sentynel: *crab apple

When Nerds Fight

Sentynel: LaZ: The formatting on your comment got a little screwy.

Sentynel: Oh, you already fixed that.

Sentynel: Quick like the ninja.

LaZorra: HA

LaZorra: STOP SPYING ON MY FACEBOOK YOU CREEPER

Sentynel: Spying!? You stop spamming my email account by multiply posting comments with my name in!

LaZorra: Oh don't you even tempt me.

Sentynel: LOL

Sentynel: I can filter them easily enough.

Sentynel: Although if you wait until I go to bed..

ThePhan: THOUSANDS OF EMAILS

Sentynel: I have 6,490MB of space left in my mailbox.

LaZorra: Well. I can always just write a script to send him random emails, unrelated to facebook.

Sentynel: See how much you can fill by tomorrow.

Sentynel: LOL

LaZorra: One every millisecond for the next eight hours ought to do it.

ThePhan: I will email you my current NaNo novel one word at a time.

Sentynel: You be careful opening engagements like that.

LaZorra: O:-)

LaZorra: Phan: YES

Sentynel: I have access to a lot of email accounts and a lot of servers, and more free time on my hands than you have.

Randy: Tonight on Rinkchat: When Nerds Fight...

Sentynel: It's like a wizards' duel, only with scripts instead of spells.

Awful Showtune Lyrics

(About the Christmas revue I'm in)

ThePhan: LZ: If you do make it out for that, you will get to hear me sing one line in the most horribly-written song ever! But you will also see me dance! And Jacob has a whole song all to himself and it will be rather gorgeous!
LaZorra: TP: LOL, that's quite the incentive...I think...
ThePhan: LOL, story about this song...
ThePhan: When the song was first handed out to us it was just a group number, and I complained to my friends all the time about how much I hated this song.
LaZorra: story!
ThePhan: Then he assigned a couple solos, but I didn't have one, and I said to those friends, "Boy, I'm glad I didn't get any of those solos. I hate that song."
ThePhan: Then the director handed out two more solos, and one of them was mine, and as soon as he announced that, these people looked at me and just smirked.
ThePhan: (Although, granted, mine is the least awful of the four.)
Sentynel: LOL
LaZorra: LOL!
Randy: What song?
Randy: LOL
Goosey: LOL
Sentynel: You were kinda asking for that to happen.
Randy: hehe
ThePhan: It's "December the 25th" from Scrooge.
* ThePhan find sit.
ThePhan: *finds it, rather
ThePhan: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mqsrm04ZFRs
ThePhan: I'm singing the part that goes: "I don't hear any arguments, so may I say forthwith, I wish that every day could be December the 25th."
ThePhan: But most of these verses MAKE NO SENSE AT ALL.
Randy: Oh my
LaZorra: Okay, I made it through the first 30 seconds and had to stop it.
ThePhan: LOL
LaZorra: I am so very sorry.
ThePhan: There is a fun spirited dance number that goes along with it, though. So that's not so bad.
LaZorra: Phew!
ThePhan: And at least I don't have to sing "Ask anyone called Robinson or Brown or Jones or Smith their favorite day and they will say December the 25th."
ThePhan: I could not have done it.
LaZorra: LOL LOL
LaZorra: EVERYONE ELSE LIKES FEBRUARY THIRD BETTER
ThePhan: OR
Sentynel: What a bizarre song.
Goosey: LOL
ThePhan: "If there's a day in history that's more than any myth, beyond a doubt one day stands out: December the 25th."
ThePhan: Are people arguing that the rest of the dates in the calendar are mythical?
ThePhan: I THINK NOT
LaZorra: I can't even begin to guess what that means.
Sentynel: Phan: I've always been suspicious of March 14th...
ThePhan: Leslie Bricusse is an awful, awful lyricist, and he writes EVERYTHING.
ThePhan: He's the one who I complained about on Facebook awhile back for his lyrics for Cyrano.
ThePhan: Roxanne is begging Cyrano to protect Christian while the guys are off at war, and she has to sing this lyric: "Forbid him to do reckless things. Don't let him ride a horse."
ThePhan: Really? They're going to war, and him riding a horse is your main concern?
Sentynel: I'm pretty sure being the only one not on a horse would be more dangerous.
ThePhan: What if everyone else is riding a horse and he's not?
ThePhan: Yeah, what Sent said.
LaZorra: ...
LaZorra: Maybe he's deathly allergic.
ThePhan: I kind of just want to read through all his lyrics ever and write a blog about how terrible a writer he is.
LaZorra: You should. It would be hilarious.
ThePhan: And it makes me furious because he frequently works with Frank Wildhorn, who's one of my very favorite composers and writes these big gothic-sounding romantic numbers...
ThePhan: ...with lyrics like "Don't let him ride a horse" or "Murder, murder, when there's one done, murder, murder can't be undone!"
LaZorra: Augh.
Goosey: LOL
Sentynel: Sure it can. Raise Dead is only a tth level cleric spell.
ThePhan: Teeth level?
Sentynel: Er.
Sentynel: *5th
Sentynel: I originally wrote 7th, then realised that was Resurrection, not Raise Dead, and changed it.
Sentynel: Only I seem to have become confused about which character I was replacing.
LaZorra: I hate it when I have to execute spells at teeth level.
ThePhan: Although my two favorite awful showtune lyrics are not from anything he wrote.
ThePhan: They are: 1) "I must resist his charms, and his manly rugged arms" from The Woman in White.
LaZorra: LOL LOL LOL
Sentynel: That's amazing.
ThePhan: And: 2) "You need to make films and write songs, you need somewhere to do it. It's what we used to dream about, think twice before you pooh-pooh it" from Rent.
ThePhan: NOBODY can sing that line and make it sound okay.
LaZorra: I was just wondering how on earth you'd get the emphasis right on that one.
LaZorra: In my head I'm going, "POOH-pooh? Pooh-POOH. poohpooh. Poooooh-POOH!"
Goosey: LOL LOL
LaZorra: CUUHPCAYKE
LaZorra: *wiggle**waggle*

The Eye of Sauron

ThePhan: Oh, I forgot to tell you guys this awful fact. When we were playing Celebrity during game time last night, Jacob and I were THE ONLY ONES IN THE ENTIRE ROOM who knew who Sauron and Harrison Ford were.

ThePhan: THE ONLY ONES

(I have since been informed this was not actually true. But whatever. This makes for a better story anyway.)

LaZorra: Phan: WHAT

Sentynel: Phan: How is that POSSIBLE?

Randy: Wow

ThePhan: Right?

ThePhan: And we were on opposite teams, so we couldn't even give them to each other to guess.

ThePhan: LOL

Randy: How do you play Celebrity?

LaZorra: Also, by mentioning them like that, I'm now imagining Sauron and Harrison Ford hanging on a Hollywood back lot together.

Goosey: LOL

LaZorra: "Have you seen that awesome new movie? The one with Sauron and Harrison Ford in it?"

LaZorra: Also, I somehow have it in my head that if Sauron were an actor, he would be Nicolas Cage.

ThePhan: Randy: Everybody writes down the names of famous people or characters on slips of paper, and then you put them all in a bowl and divide into teams, and each person has to get their teams to guess as many people as you can in a minute.

ThePhan: In the first round, you can describe them, then you put all the papers back into the bowl and guess them all again, but this time you can only give one word as a clue. And then the third round you have to act it out.

Sentynel: Sauron had quite a prolific career as an extra, until the Fall of Númenor destroyed his ability to appear as a fair man.

Randy: How was Sauron mimed? Just making a big eye?

ThePhan: Randy: Yeah, once we explained to everybody who he was.

LaZorra: sigh

LaZorra: "You know, he's the DUDE WITH THE BIG EYE. BIG EYE DUDE."

* LaZorra should really go to bed, she thinks.

Goosey: LOL

Sentynel: You should totally have done Sauron in the first round by reading the inscription on the One Ring.

Sentynel: Ash nazg durbatulûk, ash nazg gimbatul...

Goosey: Ash nazg thrakatuluk, burzum ishi krimpatul

* LaZorra should also probably not share that she has been trying to mime a big eye most of this time by making facial expressions.

Sentynel: LOL LOL

ThePhan: LZ: LOL LOL

Sentynel: LaZ: PICTURES

LaZorra: >.O

Randy: LOL

Randy: Me tooooo

ThePhan: (Now I am doing it.)

Sentynel: LaZ: Isn't that what you look like when you smile anyway? =p

ThePhan: But it's way more fun if you try to only make ONE big eye, not both of them.

[RinkChat] User Sentynel has been kicked from the room by LaZorra.

Sentynel has left.

LaZorra: TP: EXACTLY

Sentynel has entered.

Sentynel: HEY

LaZorra: I think all of us should take a picture right now of miming the big eye, and memo them all to Sam with no explanation whatsoever.

Randy: It would be like lots of "A Flash to the Eye"'s at once

LaZorra: I TOOK ONE

LaZorra: Man, this is a terrifying picture.

(She posts the picture to Facebook and links us all to it.)

LaZorra: HAHAHA. An old friend, on my Eye of Sauron pic: "Frightening, no. Looking slightly allergic to something and/or you need a coffee with a side of sanity, yes."

ThePhan: LOL

Goosey: LOL

Sentynel: LaZ: Maybe this will help with the former. http://img151.imageshack.us/img151/239/sauronw.jpg

Sentynel: Lack of frightening, that is. Not boyfriends.

Randy: aaaaaaggghhh

* LaZorra just snorted.

Sentynel: My 30-second shop job was rather delayed by trying to find a decent source image for the Eye that didn't have the edges cut off...

LaZorra: You totally need to post that in the thread.

Sentynel: Will do.

LaZorra: Also, the fact that it wouldn't attract good boyfriend material is EXACTLY what's wrong with men. :-p

LaZorra: Every dude should love a girl who can do a Sauron impersonation.

Sentynel: Complete with the flaming eye?

Sentynel: I can see how that would put people off.

LaZorra: WHAT

Goosey: LOL

* LaZorra just typed that while making the face.

Goosey: LOL!

LaZorra: IT IS ONE OF MY MANY SEXY TALENTS

Sentynel: You are utterly insane, you know.

LaZorra: I CAN ALSO FIT AN ENTIRE WAD OF SILLY PUTTY UP MY NOSE

ThePhan: My Sauron Eye brings all the boys to the yard...

Randy: LOL!

Goosey: Laz: LOL And when did you find this out?

Sentynel: When she was being silly, obviously.

Randy: YOu are crazy and we are also

LaZorra: Goosey: Well, um, it totally depends on the size of the wad.

LaZorra: With the carrots in there, I don't have THAT much room.

Goosey: LOL LOL

Sentynel: LOL LOL LOL

ThePhan: The silly putty helps keep the carrots in until you're ready to shoot.

Sentynel: Better seal on them, too. So they get launched at higher velocity.

LaZorra: Exactly! It's the secret to the whole mechanism.

.

.

.

LaZorra: Night all! I expect your Eye of Sauron pictures to be posted in the morning.

* LaZorra HUGS everyone!

LaZorra has left.

ThePhan: I think we should all quietly replace all our eyes in our FB profile photos with the flaming Eye of Sauron.

Goosey: dahaha